Sunday, March 28, 2010

I think, therefore I am...tired

I could use a little stamina about now. I have a project due tomorrow night. I want to stay up until it's done but I need sleep. Thinking has exhausted me.

I accompanied the primary children today. They sang a song in sacrament meeting. It is a song that I am reasonably comfortable playing on the piano.   It is a beautiful song and the children know it and sing it well. I started out okay but got more nervous as the song progressed. So at the beginning of the song my hands were steady but by the end they were pretty shaky. Usually I am nervous at the beginning of something but I calm down as I settle into it. Like when I have to speak in church or give a lesson, I start out shaky but that goes away. I wonder if there's a cure for shaky hands. I like playing the piano and I am pretty sure I get points for perseverence but I'd really like it to sound better.

I am trying to avoid comparing myself to others because it isn't productive but I still do it. A lot.  I am especially prone to comparing myself to my brother who is not quite 2 years older than me (1 year, 10 months and 6 days to be precise). It is a blessing and a curse to follow Gerry through life. Piano playing was especially frustrating because I can feel music, I love it. It speaks to me. I just can't play it the way I feel it. Gerry can. I love to listen to him play. He is magical. "Golden Fingers" was what they called him at the Gilbert Jr. High school talent show when he played "One tin soldier" or "Music Box dancer" or maybe both which he had learned by ear. If I didn't adore him, I would hate him. Really. A lot.

I'll just keep pounding away in primary. I am counting on my one talent being turned into two because I have not hid it under a bushel. Sorry to all who might wish that I would, hide it under a bushel, I want more.

(My apologies, It is light that gets hidden under a bushel. Talents get buried. But you know what I mean, right? )

5 comments:

Kazzy said...

I am sure you did a great job. I just wish I played at all.

K and D Roylance said...

If you find any stamina, let me know where you found it.. I could use a dose myself!

I thought you, Maggie and the children sounded great.

Even though your hands might get shaky, you are there and you are strong, in your presence and caring.

Robin said...

You did wonderfully!

I know how long you wanted this calling. I am thrilled to have you there in primary. And I believe you are truly magnifying this calling (and finding great joy in it). What more can you ask?

Danielle said...

I second what was already said. "You are strong in your presence and caring." Everyone feels your love and caring and wants to be around Dona.

I shake when I play the piano, too. Guess that's why they have me leading the music. We'd be a great team. Right? Oh, yeah, we were. Maybe someday again.

Love ya.

Robin said...

I forgot to say how much I loved the title of this post. I'm claiming this from now on: I am so tired because I think so much. Why do you have so much energy?